This summer I went swimsuit shopping at the foolishly late date of July 1st and guess what? There were five suits to choose from in my size. Not five different styles, mind you. Five suits, period. All I wanted was a little something somethin' for swimming laps at the gym, but you would've thought I was trying to get a ticket on Richard Branson's moon launch
with a request to sit next to Angelina Jolie for as hard as this was to accomplish.
I finally found a decent option. It's nothing special, but it doesn't need to be. It's merely an item of clothing to work out in - you know, so I don't have to swim laps at the gym in my suit of the birthday variety. It's affordable. I purchase it. I bring it home. I go to cut the tags off. And then I see this:
[Design details help camouflage, slim, and trim your figure imperfections. Remember, you've still got it and we're here to help you show it off!]
Thanks so much, Maxine of Hollywood! I like to set the bar low - that way I'm sure I have a shot of clearing it. And now, thanks to this inspiring tag, I can do that... right after I camouflage my depression in a platter of tater tots.
"Inspirational" messages on clothing tags - a feel good moment or something that makes you want to stab yourself in the thigh? I know which way I lean! What are your thoughts?
[Photo credit: Um, that would be me. Who else is going to admit they found this on a piece of their clothing? And thanks to my asshole laptop for the cooperation. If you get a crick in your neck, blame her for not being able to rotate the damn thing. Yes, I've decided my laptop is a her.]